What is Relationship all about?

In the course of researching the history of car inventions, I stumbled upon a history that I never knew existed. I knew Karl Benz was the first man to invent a car but I didn’t know about his wife who happened to be the key person in his success story. 

The story goes that Karl came from a poor background. At age two, his father passed on. Despite their misfortunes, his mother strove to give him a good education. He furthered his studies even till university level.

Now, this is the part where the story becomes very interesting. Karl’s first business wasn’t building cars. It was an Iron Foundry and mechanical workshop which was launched in 1871. The business did badly and if not for the timely intervention of his fiancée, Bertha Ringer who was from a rich home, things would have turned out for the worst. She used part of her Dowry to invest in the company.

Karl and Bertha got married in 1872 and despite his business misfortunes Bertha continued to support him with her Dowry as he moved into another business – manufacturing of engines/vehicles. Karl Benz built his first ‘horseless carriage’ in 1885 but had not considered marketing it as he felt it would not be accepted by the public. His wife, however, believed in him and his works and went on to prove it.

One early morning in 1885, she drove off with her two sons to visit her mother without informing her husband. Apart from the visit her other motive was to prove to her husband that he was a genius and his invention was going to be a success. She drove a distance of 106km; making her the first person to drive a car over a long distance. Her journey was not a smooth one though as she experienced hurdles along the way but she solved it all; even inventing brake lining in the process. This successful trip brought world-wide attention to the Benz Motorwagen and she got the company its first sales. This is how Karl Benz came to be the first inventor of a car and he later went on to found Mercedes Benz. They lived as husband, wife and business partners for 57 years till Karl died in 1929 at the age of 85 while Bertha died in 1944 at the age of 95.

Very touching right? I don’t know about you but it is truly an inspiring one.

If there is anything to learn from this it is:

Despite their different backgrounds, they both saw themselves as partners. They both shared whatever they had. She believed in him. She went the extra mile to prove that her husband’s ingenuity had a future. Everything she did was not for her alone but for both of them; though her husband gets to take the glory – which is how it should be. As for Karl, he knew his success depended largely on his wife and you can imagine the pride he would have for her. Where he is mentioned, his wife will always be by his side.

In summary, relationships are meant to be mutually beneficial not competitive or parasitic. It should be a state where one’s success/failure is the other’s success/failure. Quite a number of relationships today are built on competition and in worse cases; one partner is basically out to devour the other. It does not make sense that spouses should be competing against each other when the competition is outside; and it is utterly barbaric that a partner should see the other as a prey.

 Relationships Are Meant To Be Mutually Beneficial 

No doubt there will be misunderstandings and quarrels (not fights) and it should not linger for long; by long I mean it should not crossover into another day if possible. For every quarrel that is not settled on time, it will only widen the gap of discord and emotional distancing.

Ponder On This

As a woman do you believe in your man or do you listen to so-called friends or family members to dump him and move on simply because things are not going well?

As a man will you forget the woman that stood beside you during tough times and go after other women when times are good?

Are you considering marrying a man/woman because you believe in him/her or is it because one of you is rich?

Are you ready to go the extra mile for the one you love - your partner or will you turn your back at the first hint of failure?

If any of your answers to the above is the latter, then you are already headed down the wrong path in your relationship. It may not be obvious now…but with time it will come crashing.

Anything that is good is good and worth emulating.